critical condition, critically critical

At this moment, I'm about to lose the one person that I love the most, Wan.

Aku mintak maaf pada kawan-kawan semua sebab the plans tak jadi. Tak dapat ikot pegi Cameron, tak dapat join MPG (the last get together with everyone), tak dapat nak bagi gambar - gambar yang aku janji kan.

If only that you guys are in my shoes. Aku sangat down. Aku sangat depressed. I love this old lady so much. Last two weeks she called asking me to join a kenduri before babah pegi umrah but I didn't come sebab ada paper yang sangat hardcore selama 3 hari. Kononnya I had to study gempak-gempak.

I regretted it. Patotnye, aku persetankan semua hal-hal duniawi dan go and have fun with my family. Aku menyesal sebab selalu Wan will call my name, "Siti Adibah"! dengan gaya yang paling manja dan sangat pleasing. Tapi, not anymore.

Wan dah koma. She's not responding. Aku panggil dia tapi there's no answer from her. She's not opening her eyes. Aku redha when the doctors said that she has no hope. They wanted to do a second operation tapi tak sanggup lah nak tengok Wan suffer. She sufferred enough.

Biar la dia tidur. Let her rest. Aku tau she's still here. Bila aku ngaji untuk dia, ada air mata yang mengalir. The one thing that I don't understand kalau her brains are no longer responsive, kenapa dia nangis?

Wan, I miss you. Everytime that I sit next to her and ngaji, I would always cakap, "Wan, bangun la Wan. Nanti panggil nama along lagi mcm selalu k?" tapi takde respond. Seriously cakap, sangat-sangat depressing.

Wan, I miss you. I miss your laughs. I miss your voice. I miss everything about you.

Jom la doakan Wan aku semoga before she goes, she open her eyes and calls my name one last time.

Dan semoga dia damai.

Comments

  1. insyaAllah adib...
    we will all pray for her...

    i understand how u feel

    be strong adib and keep on mengaji for her because tho her brain might not be functioning, but her soul is around to feel your love

    be strong adib...

    ReplyDelete
  2. be strong adeb..

    she can hear you still..

    ReplyDelete
  3. :)

    i know u can do it, adib..she loves you..she doesnt want u to be so sad..be strong k...

    ReplyDelete
  4. hurm...
    sorry to hear tat!!
    no wonder la ade sorg missing je smlm
    it was owes u who took pics around so wen u were not around,it felt a bit missin der...
    so for now i'll b prayin for ur grandma too!!

    tc adeb!!

    ReplyDelete

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