A note from a mother to her beloved son, Adel
"18.5.2009 - We had our routine appointment to see the specialist at Child Development Center in HUKM and Adel was diagnosed with Austism Spectrum Disorder today at HUKM. In the beginning when we started to take him there about a year ago, it was said that he had GDD (Global Development Delay). Then it was PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder Not Otherwise Specified). Before, it was not enough to say his Autistic.. because of his points were not enough although he does have some of the criteria of an autistic child but today after a series of interviews with us, he's point went up just at the par to diagnose him with Autism Spectrum Disorder...
How do I fell?? I don't know.. Maybe I expected it since the beginning when his development was delayed. I always felt something was not right with him. When he kept on lying on his back and look at the ceiling when he was suppose to roll over. When he kept on rolling over when he was suppose to crawl. When he kept on crawling when he was suppose to walk. When he didn't utter a word until he was after 2 and only started calling me mama after his 2nd birthday. (that was the happiest day for me) When he kept on pointing at what he wanted instead of asking for it. When he was always afraid of other people except his caregivers. When he avoided eye contacts and would hide behind us when meeting people. When he would show tantrum when going for functions because his dislike the attention. Or even when he likes to stack or line things up neatly and nicely. Initially people said that don't worry too much, he's a boy. Boy is always a bit delayed compared to a girl. So i did wait and try not to worry too much.
But it was mind boggling for me when he was still not talking at 28 months and that's was when we were referred to CDC by Dr Azizi, Adel's pediatrician. He was referred with having speech delay and severe stranger anxiety. It has been close to a year since then.. We have been going to HUKM on an average of 2x monthly for different appointments. He sees the specialist in CDC, the psychologist, the speech therapist, the occupational therapist and once the audio therapist. I haven't missed one appointment since then except for once when I came back from Umrah and I totally forgot about it due to the fatigue and lack of sleep I was having.. for that Adel, mama is so sorry because you have to wait until July to reschedule the OT appointment. Sometimes I went there just with Adel, just to 2 of us. Sometimes together with Baba and sometimes the whole family went including Ariq and mak Imah. His appointment could last for hours sometimes to a point he will fall asleep. But Alhamdulillah at least he still cooperates most of the times we bring him. He can even recognize HUKM and where to go once there.
After a year, he did show improvement like his speech.. he's slowly making sentences now, and even asking questions.. although sometimes we seriously don't understand what he was trying to say.. It's a good effort sayang.. :) He can grasp better with his fingers instead of using his palm. He is less afraid of strangers although he still avoids eye contact. He acknowledge and play better with his brother. He is learning to take turns although it's still his turn most of the time.. Conclusion is he shows improvement and I thank Allah for that.
Now, it's our duty to help him out for his future.. I'm trying to learn to understand him and his behaviour, trying to understand his temper and to deal with it, learning ways to guide him to live like other kids so in the future he will be not left behind. Whatever ways there is insyaAllah mama will learn it to teach you sayang.. and also learning to tell others to please excuse my son for behaving that way when be behaves terribly. At the same time I also have to think about Ariq, as I don't want him to feel neglected to the attention that we gave his brother. There's so much to learn and I hope I can do it for the sake of both my sons.
As long as I live, the love that I have for you will never ever die...."
...and for that makndak, I will let Adel know how much you love him and Ariq when they've grown up later. And if any of them forgotten about your sacrifices or your love to them, I will remind them over and over again and for that also, I pray for his healthiness and InsyaAllah, Adel will have the future that both you and my uncle dreamed for.