What the hell is wrong with me?

I have made several stupid and very much indeed ludicrous decisions.

Today I have decided I don't want to play Gamelan for the Convocation which I have played once before. It is my passion but why suddenly this?

Last few months, I decided to have a long-distance relationship with an Indonesian guy in Jogjakarta and it fails.

I hurt him a lot when I said that we have to put this to an end. Amazingly, how did I know he is hurt when he didn't even reply any of my sms. He didn't even say a word.

In brief, I hurt him in so many ways. I just did. I know.


A few months earlier before the semester break, I decided to ask my dad to pay for the airplane tickets to Indonesia and me, Oja and Amir had decided to have a tour there while visiting Wahyu. I don't know whether I'm still going or not. It is supposed to be next year right after me and Oja have finally graduated from our long 4-5 years of study.

Maybe we will go but not touring Indonesia. Maybe we should just go to Bandung and jalan-jalan there.


To make my life even harder, I have injudiciously had a squabble with Oja and Sam. I know I shouldn't have done that due to our long relationship together as besties since we were in the primary.

Luckily that I finally gathered my sense and logic I apologised to both of them and we are good now. heh.

Everything happened due to my lack of judgment into deciding matters. I know I'm lacking in every way and this is me in this life learning. It is the same as teaching. Life is the process of learning. I'm learning from my mistakes and hoping in the future that I will seek for betterment or at least try to be a little bit wiser.


p.s. Oja has been my bestie since we were in Fatima Kindergarten. We went to the same primary and secondary. We still live in the same place. Setiawangsa.


p.s.s. I Love Oja more than anything in this world.


Popular Posts